If you’re a parent, I guarantee someone you may or may not know has given you parenting advice whether it was solicited or not. Sometimes it may be helpful but other times it is not. Everyone believes they are an expert in parenting and the truth is that each child is extremely different and there is no one ‘right’ way to parent - parenting is a lot of trial and error. 

Asking for parenting advice is courageous and can make you feel vulnerable. If you decide to do this, try to be open minded and consider if this advice could be applicable to your child. If it is, then great, try it and see what happens! If you don’t feel like this is suitable for your child, then thank the person giving the advice and move on. 

I think as a parent, one of the hardest things is receiving unsolicited parenting advice. I do believe that ultimately people mean well and they think that they’re helping but they fail to recognize that you are not asking for their help. Before you respond, it may be a good idea to take a long, slow, deep breath so that it comes across a little more diplomatically. If we don’t take the time to try to calm ourselves, our response may be angry, sarcastic, frustrated, or something else. Remember our children model our behavior, so if they see you using coping skills to handle a difficult situation and regulate your emotions, then they will too. There’s a few different ways to consider how to handle getting unsolicited advice (after you take your deep breath of course): ignore them, smile and walk away, say ‘thank you’, or ‘I never thought of that before’. 

At the end of the day, you know your child best and will parent the best that you can at that time. Sometimes we have those parenting moments where you want to pat yourself on the back and other times, you want to crawl into a hole and hide. Remember to give yourself compliments when you have parenting wins. When maybe the best parenting choices aren’t made, reframe them and try to determine what you learned and what you could do differently in the future. Don’t agonize over what happened, we all make mistakes, move forward and apologize to your child if need be. This shows your child that even parents make mistakes and it is courageous to apologize and to move on. If you’d like to further discuss your parenting, please consider scheduling an appointment to discuss.